Day 181

All is not lost. I disappeared from this blog for a minute, but I haven't given it up!

What I have done is re-evaluated my list and changed a couple of things. A few were just not very realistic (I really will probably not be scheduling a pin-up girl style photo shoot any time in the foreseeable future) and I realized there were some other things that were more important to me that I make a firm commitment to (exclusive breastfeeding for Max's first 6 months).

I am often very critical of myself and, while I can be extremely flexible with everything else in the world, I don't often cut myself any slack. Done with the self-harshness! I need to give myself permission to change my mind and goals, starting with this list. (I even changed item #101 to reflect this.)

Along the way, I have managed to cross a few more things off my list. I have sent 25 postcards to postcrossing.com (#18). I have enjoyed this so much that I have no plans to stop. I'll be interested in seeing how many postcards I have by the end of Day 1001! I told my friend, Lily, about that goal. She is nine years old and signed up right away. Not only has she received 4 postcards aleady, but she has become a letter writer because of this. How fabulous! Although she lives less than 2 miles a day, I can count on at least 1 or 2 delightful letters tucked among the bills every week. I love writing her back. When I met my Sweetheart so many years ago, we wrote countless letters to each other; I have missed having a pen pal.

#14 (Attempt a drug-free, completely natural childbirth) has also been crossed off. I did not succeed at this - a Cesaerean section was neccessary to get Max here safely - but I did my best to try. I even went in for a (somewhat forced) induction that lasted two excruciating days, hoping that if the process was kickstarted I could deliver him without further interventions. Alas! it was not to be, but not through any lack of effort on my part, so I count this as worth being crossed off.

I love #30. I use my Moby easily with Max and he (usually) likes it. I have obtained a Maya ring sling but haven't had a chance to learn to use it yet. I am confident I will, though, and I still harbor dreams of getting a woven wrap and learning the intricacies of Babywearing.

In all, I think I have 14 items crossed off. There's a long way to go still, but I think I can do it. There are also a few more items I am considering taking off the list, but I'll wait a while and be sure I have worthy replacements for those things before striking them.